Ellipses (me, trying to be cool.)

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Hate List

While I’m not much of a hater, there are people who annoy me. That annoyance can transcend into something similar to hate. I felt the most appropriate action to take would be describe my hatred behind their backs on a blog they’d never read:

  1. People who ask stupid questions: Yes, there are stupid questions. If you think there are no stupid questions, you’re either a teacher who is forced to think this way (i.e. my sister) or see #2. Asking if it’s raining as you step outside into the rain, is stupid. You get the point…
  2. People who think there are no stupid questions: See examples of stupid questions in #1.
  3. Bill Walton: shut up.
  4. People who abuse the word elite: See this.
  5. People who, on a left turn onto a two lane road, feel the need to turn into the median area so they can merge into the actual lane: Needs no explaining.
  6. My mail man: I don’t actually hate you, I hate how you write little annoying notes on my mail. I’m sorry the person who sent me mail wrote Do Not Bend and didn’t pay for it. Not my fault. I’m sorry T-Mobile didn’t include my apartment on my billing address. That was my fault, but a note? Seriously? There are four units. My name is on the box. You figured it out. Don’t take your job that seriously. You aren’t going to save the USPS from its inevitable doom from the extra 56 cents for Do Not Bend mail…
  7. Evening tunnel security guard at International District Station: You take your job too seriously. You aren’t God. If you are, I feel sorry for humanity. The world will not end if I step on the yellow textured strip.
  8. Hugh Jackman: You can dance, you can sing, you can play the piano, you make a fierce wolverine, you produced a lot of the X-Men movies, you’re an incredibly talented actor, you’re apparently a pretty awesome person, and you’re man pretty. I hate you. Be less talented, please.

Note: This list will undoubtedly forever grow. If you are on this list, and don’t wish to be, buy me food or a cup of joe. Creating your own hate list including me won’t help, and really, is kind of mean. You should be disappointed in yourself.